Renting to Relatives
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Renting to Relatives (by CJS [OH]) Apr 6, 2019 6:28 PM
       Renting to Relatives (by LisaFL [FL]) Apr 6, 2019 7:14 PM
       Renting to Relatives (by JKJ [MA]) Apr 6, 2019 7:34 PM
       Renting to Relatives (by Robert J [CA]) Apr 6, 2019 7:50 PM
       Renting to Relatives (by JB [OR]) Apr 6, 2019 7:55 PM
       Renting to Relatives (by Deanna [TX]) Apr 6, 2019 8:00 PM
       Renting to Relatives (by Txlord [TX]) Apr 6, 2019 9:51 PM
       Renting to Relatives (by Jim In O C [CA]) Apr 7, 2019 3:34 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by Jim In O C [CA]) Apr 7, 2019 3:34 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by LindaJ [NY]) Apr 7, 2019 4:35 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by NE [PA]) Apr 7, 2019 4:51 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by plenty [MO]) Apr 7, 2019 5:16 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by RB [MI]) Apr 7, 2019 5:35 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by Steve [MA]) Apr 7, 2019 7:51 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by Oregon Woodsmoke [ID]) Apr 7, 2019 8:15 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by Nicole [PA]) Apr 7, 2019 8:18 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by AllyM [NJ]) Apr 7, 2019 8:18 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by Landlord ofthe Flies [TX]) Apr 7, 2019 11:13 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by Ken [NY]) Apr 7, 2019 11:37 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by Txlord [TX]) Apr 7, 2019 12:52 PM
       Renting to Relatives (by Mike [TX]) Apr 7, 2019 5:01 PM
       Renting to Relatives (by RockyMtnLL [CO]) Apr 7, 2019 5:18 PM
       Renting to Relatives (by S i d [MO]) Apr 8, 2019 5:01 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by CJS [OH]) Apr 8, 2019 9:34 AM
       Renting to Relatives (by Rathdrumgal [ID]) Apr 9, 2019 3:46 PM

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Renting to Relatives (by CJS [OH]) Posted on: Apr 6, 2019 6:28 PM

State Specific Question About: OHIO (OH)

Ok, our rental house in OH is paid for and my husband decides to rent to his mother. We have a one story house with two bedrooms and no steps--thats why she wants to live here. Yes, I get that this is a bad idea, but I need whatever advice you can throw at me. Instead of her daughter-in-law I will be her Landlord, and her new title is tenant. We really don't have a relationship, but my husband feels he has to help his Mom out as she ages. She is divorced, gets Social Security and irons and babysits for people on the side. He basically cut her rent in half. Will any good come out of this???

Renting to Relatives (by LisaFL [FL]) Posted on: Apr 6, 2019 7:14 PM

Read the IRS regs on renting to relatives. There are definitely consequences.

And it will change the dynamic of your relationship. That may not be a bad thing if both sides understand what the expectations are and both sides live up to them.

Renting to Relatives (by JKJ [MA]) Posted on: Apr 6, 2019 7:34 PM

They say don’t rent to friends and family for a’ll lose friends and family! Personally I will never rent to friends or most family, I would rent to my mother or father if they needed to live in my apartment but that’s it and only because my wife gets along with my parents as if there her own. (I actually think they like her more than me) Only advice I can offer is make sure you and your husband have an in depth talk about what is expected of your mother-in-law, how and who will address any issues that may arise with her in regards to her tenancy. By talking and deciding what is expected of her, what happens if she doesn’t do what is expected, and who talks to her about not meeting your expectations now, could possibly prevent a major problem later. Not only with your mother-in-law but also the relationship with your husband. As an example, if she’s late paying the rent, how long before she’s talked to and who is the 1 that will talk to her? If she fails to pay the rent saying she doesn’t have it for whatever reason, what do you do, who talks to her? 1 other thing you might think of doing is have her SSI check deposited directly into you or your husbands account, then give her the difference after you take out rent and utilities.

Renting to Relatives (by Robert J [CA]) Posted on: Apr 6, 2019 7:50 PM

Then when your mother-in-law allows others to stay with her for free and she won't be able to make the rent, you will be the "bad" person asking for the rent to be paid on time. Why can't you just allow her to live there for free -- as other judge you.

I had a lady who threw a party with 40 family guests. She was behind on her rent of $800 per month for a 3 bedroom home. She had been served with an eviction case earlier that day. Her family members were upset with me and called me names -- why did I have to have the rent money now? So I responded, that if all 40 guests each pitched in Twenty Bucks each, I would drop the case. NOT ONE SINGLE person (family member) gave me even two nickles to rub between my fingers.

Fact of life, with family or friends as tenants, you'd better make sure they have stellar credit, money in the back and good income so they can afford to pay the rent, utilities, insurance, car payments, etc. --47.156.xx.xx

Renting to Relatives (by JB [OR]) Posted on: Apr 6, 2019 7:55 PM

If you rent your property below actual value, the IRS does not recognize that property as a rental. Instead, the IRS classifies it as a personal residence. A personal residence is a property rented by the owner or the owner’s family for less than 14 days or 10% of the number of days in the year. And renting your property below fair market value to a tenant, whether they are a family member or not, would still be considered a personal residence, not a rental property.

Renting your property below market value is legal, but you lose beneficial tax breaks if you do so. Just be aware of the implications on your tax returns.

Renting to Relatives (by Deanna [TX]) Posted on: Apr 6, 2019 8:00 PM

Don't give anyone anything you're not willing to turn into a gift at some point.

Renting to Relatives (by Txlord [TX]) Posted on: Apr 6, 2019 9:51 PM

You mean you don't want to help your mom, who brought you up in this world!!!!!!! Really!!!!

Renting to Relatives (by Jim In O C [CA]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 3:34 AM

My policy is firm, sorry no friends, relatives or employees.

Renting to Relatives (by Jim In O C [CA]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 3:34 AM

My policy is firm, sorry no friends, relatives or employees.

Renting to Relatives (by LindaJ [NY]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 4:35 AM

Unless his mother is a terrible person, drug addict, or thief, and she keeps a decent house now, I would rent to a parent. As long as I can financially support it without creating a problem for me. As Txlord said she is his mother, and she probably did a lot for your husband when he was young. I consider it pay back. Again assuming that she is a good person trying to help herself as well. At some point as they get older, they need assistance.

But as Deanna said, you have to consider it a gift. You have to realize it is going to be a different relationship and it needs to be discussed before hand. As long as she can take care of the place. When she doesn't keep it up anymore you will also be able to recognize the mental decline that sometimes comes with age and deal with that.

I would certainly rather rent a unit to my mother than have her live WITH me. I would also rent to a child IF they are responsible. It is family. And yes, it is a different relationship than other tenants. Cousins, Uncles, niece and more extended family is no. Too many other relatives come along with that. But I say that knowing my family. Other families have their issues.

Renting to Relatives (by NE [PA]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 4:51 AM

Will any good come of this? No.

Renting to Relatives (by plenty [MO]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 5:16 AM

Seriously she is your mom or mother inlaw... i would view this differently and totally take a different view. You are sure to fail with this attitude and perspective. If yiu want to stand there with this business hat on then rent the house to whomever you dont know and send half of that or whatever number to mom to help her pay market rent somewhere a condo where the grass doesn't need cutting and the gutters are someone's elses responsibility. It your mother in law!!

Renting to Relatives (by RB [MI]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 5:35 AM

Warning: Not for the faint of heart.

It can be done successfully,

but only a small % of Landlords / Managers have the experience

and the "stuff" to even attempt it.

Renting to Relatives (by Steve [MA]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 7:51 AM

We've allowed various family members to either stay with us in our granny suite or in one of our rentals. It didn't always end well. Now since our parents are gone, if the need arises we'd offer financial assistance to help them stay in someone else's place. --96.237.xx.xx

Renting to Relatives (by Oregon Woodsmoke [ID]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 8:15 AM

It's a bad idea, but it is going to happen, so my advice is that you tell your husband that you are turning 100% of the care of the rental and the new tenant to him. Then stick to it.

If she needs anything, needs repairs, doesn't pay rent, violates the lease, refer her to your husband.

Then wipe it from your mind that you even own the house. Make it "not your problem".

Myself, I wouldn't allow the cut in family income to come out of my housing budget. He wants to give free rent to his mom, it should come out of his budget.

Renting to Relatives (by Nicole [PA]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 8:18 AM

I am completely different than most. This is not a business decision.... it's personal. She is not your tenant, she is your husband's mother. What kind of marriage is it when you can't help out your husband's mother?

Renting to Relatives (by AllyM [NJ]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 8:18 AM

You need to figure out how to accept this because if you don't, you will look like a REALLY BAD PERSON. The bottom line is Mom goes in the house or you go to divorce court.

Renting to Relatives (by Landlord ofthe Flies [TX]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 11:13 AM

OK, first of all it's a bad idea all around. Your relationship with both your husband and his mother will be forever damaged.

Best solution:

You rent the house to someone else, and use that income to subsidize his mother's rent in another place under a non-family landlord. Now, you and your husband are on your mother-in-law's side. You're all tenants. You'll never be put in an opposing position. You could justify this by the laws of personal property making it more expensive since it's being rented below market value.

Worst solution:

You're relationship with your mother-in-law is not secure enough (as you mentioned) to have you act as her landlord. Also any dispute you have with her, she'll go to your husband and put him in the middle. So, I suggest if you can't talk them into renting somewhere else that you help subsidize, then I suggest you walk away from this and let him manage the rental and you stay forever silent. Don't get involved in the slightest way. That way you can't be dragged into it and your relationship with your husband can't be damaged.

Seriously, you don't want to do this. It will wreck your marriage unless you put her somewhere else. Paying for it accomplishes everything your husband wants anyway so you're not going to look like a bad person and you might actually enjoy family dinners once again.

Renting to Relatives (by Ken [NY]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 11:37 AM

I am 100% in agreement with Nicole.This is your mother in law who deserves the help unless she is a terrible person to begin with.I wouldn't charge any rent if you can do that financially.I wouldn't do this for anyone else,,not even a child unless they have serious health issues but your parents are your parents

Renting to Relatives (by Txlord [TX]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 12:52 PM

Better solution is to let the mom stay RENT free and take the house as second home on Tax deduction.

I hope I don't ever get in a similar situation like this mom

Btw I have actually bough a home for my parents to stay in it for ever. Now recently both passed away. I am glad I did it.

Renting to Relatives (by Mike [TX]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 5:01 PM

My mom rented to my niece for 6 years.... they don’t speak anymore. Does that answer your question?

Renting to Relatives (by RockyMtnLL [CO]) Posted on: Apr 7, 2019 5:18 PM

I really like Txlord's answer. My first instinct was to rent out your property at full price and give your mom a set portion of the funds on whatever place she chooses to rent. That way, if she doesn't abide by rules, or moves in relatives that are difficult and don't pay, or causes a fire, or whatever, it is the other guy she'll hate and you'll remain a hero. I've rented to family multiple times - always someone in distress and needing a break - and it was remarkably painful in such unexpected ways with each one.

Perhaps the winner in my own stories was with an irritable uncle who had left his wife - but not with a divorce. Then, the 70+ year old coot fell in love with a 20-something teacher/tenant neighbor. He gave her guns, silver, many valuables while she played him beautifully. He began lobbying for every wrong that either of them felt necessary for their apartments, and when we didn't comply with excessive demands, he stirred up trouble with virtually everyone in the building. His goal was to have all of them stop paying rent - in a 5-plex. Gads. Before it was done, he had turned my husband in to the sheriff for catching a tenant's cat "unkindly." The cat wasn't hurt - at all, but was running loose after already prompting a fire department call that involved a tree limb breaking and doing $1,000 damage to another tenant's car. Of course, that cost came back to us. My husband returned the cat to the owner, but Uncle ranted on and on about the cat yowling when he was caught and wanted a full vet visit to rule out broken bones.

Anyway, ultimately, we terminated his lease - and ALL the family relatives hated us for a while - because none of them wanted to allow him to live with them. The whole thing was worthy of a Jerry Springer show - and I regretted my charitable nature for a long time thereafter.

Again, he was only one - the others were my kids. They had other freakish endings. While I think the other advice is good, I would not rent to relatives again. Period. I'll give them $$$ before I let them hold me hostage for living arrangements.

Renting to Relatives (by S i d [MO]) Posted on: Apr 8, 2019 5:01 AM

Hey...nice to see you here CJS.

A few thoughts...

1) Families CAN do business together, but expectations have to be crystal clear up front. And there DOES have to be a set of rules and "this is how we're doing to do this." Important rules would be: guest policy, moving in another resident, housekeeping, etc.

2) It depends on the person. If a family member has a poor track record &/or history of bad behaviors, then absolutely do not let them move into your unit.

3) A clear understanding between you and your husband about "helping vs. enabling." I don't know any of you...his mom included. Sometimes sons are the apple of mom's eye; other times their rage against each other is barely contained and/or a passive-aggressive nightmare. You know the old saying..."Anything with more than 1 head is a monster." If you and hubby are not united on this deal, it's not going to go well. Your promised to love, cherish, and honor HIM for a lifetime. Likewise, he promised to do that for you. Neither of you promised his mom that. Your relationship ALWAYS comes first...and that goes for both him and you. In other words, if you cannot be comfy with this land lord relationship with his mom, he will need to accept that. It ain't a one-way street. Husband and wife are a team...the old marriage vows said, "For this reason a man will leave his parent's household and CLEAVE to his wife, and the two shall become ONE FLESH." Strong language. Absolutely. Not in fashion to quote from the Scriptures these days, but that's how it really works...regardless of what folks think they know. The best marriages are those that see themselves as one person, one whole. Each caring for the other as for him/herself. This is probably the most important of all the consideration.

All those considerations on the table, I would try to help his mom find a suitable living situation. My wife and I would NOT be comfy doing this kind of a deal, regardless of whether it was her folks or mine. We both love our parents and we both get along very well with each others' parents. So it's not a question of love, or care, or bad relationships. We simply know we wouldn't risk setting up a bad scenario that could potentially drive a wedge between us. We'd pony up the cash to her parent X find a place to live, but there would still be a candid discussion regarding expectations. Example, "Mom we love you and we want to help you live somewhere decent. We're prepared to contribute $X toward an apartment, and we'll do so as long as this type of arrangement is good for you."

So if mom moved in a drug dealer ex-con boyfriend... that's not good for her, is it? So the money would stop.

Renting to Relatives (by CJS [OH]) Posted on: Apr 8, 2019 9:34 AM


I will post an update same time next year weather it be a good or bad outcome and the lessons that I learned along the way. Definitely not in our business plan, but life happens and you adjust. "Staying positive, professional, and "somewhat" in control.

Renting to Relatives (by Rathdrumgal [ID]) Posted on: Apr 9, 2019 3:46 PM

Put her in a low income senior apartment. She does not need 2 bedrooms.

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