So I posted an ad for my 2 bedroom, 1 bath house for rent after THIRTY years with the same tenants. Thye went home to their home country and I miss them, having been friends and neighbors before I bought the property from our original Landlord.

I spent a full month painting, replacing fridge, washer, wall heater, range, carpeting, blinds, curtains and loads of other thing.

I advertised only 2-3 occupants because of the sewer pump system that serves 2 houses. It overloads if any more than that are using it and floods the back house with 'stuff'.

So I keep getting families of 4-7 people applying for the rental. I thought the ads were clearly stated but I am wondering why so many are not reading them before appearing to tour the place. Very tiring and lots of wasted time.

Last night, at 7 pm, a car drives down to the back house, 2 adults exit and I go to see who they are. I only show the house between 10am and 5 pm. Turns out it's a couple who contacted me on my email and I said to come at the appropriate times. That didn't happen.

So they open the SUV door and out jumps a 2 year old very active kiddo. He is at the house door grabbing a pulling at it before I can get to it. Inside we all tour (they also had a 1 year or less babe in arms) the small house and the 2 year old finds Halloween candy on the sign-in table and rips open some M&Ms and they go all over the kitchen, into the living room (brand new carpet) etc. Mom and Dad just ignore him. I'm horrified thinking chocolate stains one a light beige carpet will be fun to remove.

Then just as they are leaving, the kid yells from the living room, "PEE PEE" and heads for the spotless, white, bathroom. As the mom asks if it's OK, and I am yelling NO NO, I hear the lid of the toilet hit the back and I tell Mom to GO get HIM!

They all leave, I'm afraid to look in the bathroom but when I do, the lids are up and the 'hang over the bowl' deodorizer is in the SINK. Not sure how it got there. Happily no pee pee anywhere I can see.

So with the limit if 2-3 I figure maybe I can include the baby who is tiny and make it 4 and maybe I can overlook the whirling dervish kid, and they I ask if this is all the family. Nope, there is another kid, age 20 so the Dad says. Now we have 5 and the parent's don't look much over 20 themselves. Not really wanting them to return the application!

Hi Sorta, haven't seen you post here before. Welcome to Mr. LL! Come back and read & ask questions often.

I have not had any experiences like that since I started pre-screening carefully. I find that there are lot of time-waster out there, and I am jealously protective of my time. If you only have the one unit, it might not be such a big deal. But a few pointers...

Rule # 1 - You cannot limit the number of occupants. Your local occupancy code can. If your sewer system can't handle the load, it's probably time to upgrade.

Rule # 2 - Do not ever make it about the kids. Ever. For any reason. Even if they are h-e- double hockey sticks on wheels. Doesn't matter. Fair Housing testers would love to find a land lord who denied based on kids and turn that person into a poster-child for an illegal discrimination law suit.

Now what you CAN do it make it about behavior. If they ever apply, write "Applicant(s) showed careless and/or indifferent behavior during showing...DENIED."

Also, if you are an owner-occupant of the rented property, there could be exceptions to Federal Fair Housing rules. But be sure to get them from a reputable source like a land lord / tenant attorney.

Notice the word "child/kid/toddler" didn't appear anywhere in that phrase. I would use that kind of language no matter what. Can't really argue with it regardless of fair housing.

Good luck finding new tenants!

.

Welcome to our world!

Not reading your ad is par for the course. These people just respond to every ad, hoping to find a naïve enough LL who will not see the vey blatant "warning signs" and who will not run credit and background checks.

Thanks for the advice Sid. I've been around Mr. LL before but don't post often. I appreciate your help.

As for the Fair Housing requirements, I'm very careful in person and on my applications not to mention age, sex, family status, legal status, and all that other stuff I can't legally say. I only mentioned it here to explain the fun I had last night. I always give out an application no matter how bad I think they will be. So far, even though I told each one I'd consider more occupants, etc., nobody has returned the application. Seems most of the lookers are desperate to get out of somewhere they are being forced to leave. Little tidbits dropped by one or the other looking at the place. I'm assuming most can't qualify on credit basis or can't come up with the one month's rent plus a security deposit. No one has even asked about lowering the rent or negotiating the security, which I might do for the right applicant. Best application was the guy who admitted a DUI in his past. I'd rent to him in a heartbeat with all the other good stuff about him. Not biased on a lot of stuff.

The sewer pump system has always been a problem. It's one of the reasons the original Landlord sold me the place after I'd rented from them for 20 years. Hard to sell, hard to get a mortgage lender (3 months). It's a city required semi-sealed pump and it's the highest capacity one sold. Replaced it once after a tenant deliberately sabotaged it with carpet strands, animal hair, cigarette butts, and other nice things. Found out all the 'rules' about the system from the city. It services 2 houses and does pretty well unless someone doesn't listen to what can go down it. Children and angry tenants are my worst abusers.

Upgrading would mean installing a second pump for the other house, running 200 feet (yep) of new sewer line to the street, and the permit fees, and hook-up fees, etc. Way too expensive for me to handle. I already considered that to avoid the headache of calling a plumber every 6 months for a clean out. I'd have to sell the property before I'd do that.

SID, you absolutely can limit the number of PERSONS in a rental. Even Fair Housing understands there are limits based on size and other issues.

You can't advertise a two-bedroom and then say no kids, though.

So we always remove a bedroom. Remove/remodel the closet so i'ts not a closet anymore, remove a door or turn it more into an office or craft space or even just storage.

Yeah Vee, what a mess with carpet. I swore I would never have it in a rental again and then...couldn't afford tile or anything solid so I had to get carpet for a fast turn around. Got a nice low loop in the beige color that matches the dirt outside. Then, I managed to get black grout on the edge of the carpet when I replaced a kitchen tile. Oh!

My other rental, re-done 15 years ago we did ALL ceramic tile floors. Medium Oak wood grain 3x12 inch tiles and did a different pattern in each room. I had fun planning the layouts. Awesome looking and in 15 years, not a crack or chip or anything. Looks like it was just installed.

Step one, I would never show a house to an applicant who missed their appointment and showed up after business hours. Just that rule will save you a lot of bad applicants.

If they don't show up for an appointment, no more chances.

Sorta,

Great real life story! Best , funniest read of the day!

(and reminds me again why we screen before showing!)

Just advertise this as a one bedroom if you want fewer occupants.

For $8 remove the bedroom privacy locking doorknob and replace it with a non-locking passage knob. No longer qualifies as a bedroom.

'...I told each one I'd consider more occupants...' That simple comment could land you in Fair Housing court. State the limit and stick to it - treating EVERYONE the same.

Fair Housing law (as I have been taught) does not consider a baby under one year old to be a PERSON in the headcount. Familial Status does not allow us to consider the baby will soon be a PERSON. We must look at the present, not the future.

BRAD

PS

My sewer guy says to never use the hang over the bowl deodorizers. He makes a LOT of money pulling them out of toilet traps and sewer lines.

Put a blue thing in the tank.

Thanks for the tips BRAD. My plumber also makes a ton on those Lysol type cakes in the bowl. I use I use Soft Scrub in the bowl. 4 little balls sealed in a plastic cage. Can't fall in no matter what. My plumber approves. I was using a cake type in the tank until one of them got small enough to be sucked in and then never again. Lots of pressure in the tank of a toilet. Wow.

Yeah, I don't count babies as 'occupants'. It's very funny to come up with the right words when they ask if it's 3 of them (hubby,wife,baby) and I have to figure out how to say the baby isn't counted as a person? occupant? renter? or just doesn't count? Gotta choose words carefully.

So I just got my first disgruntled applicant. Actually I'm hoping she and hubby and kids won't return the application. Hubby made the email contact and set up the appointment, and instead the wife arrives and I'm confused. Had to play 20 questions before I got the information she and he were together.

She announces on meeting me that her husband is a 'contractor'. Not just a contractor, but a CONTRACTOR. She emphasized the fact. OK, sounds good to me. Then goes around saying how much he could improve my property. I reply I don't intend to pay anyone to improve anything and have done all the improvements for the moment to be sure everything is safe and up to code.

Paint inside is not up to her liking, and I must admit it could use another coat, but not right now. Yard needs more fencing? No dogs allowed so why the extra fencing?

So she goes from room to room picking apart anything she can find to make it sound bad. Loves the kitchen, hates the kitchen. Huh? Because she says she would spend all her time in there.

AND why is the washer in the kitchen? Gee, maybe because the house was built that way in 1952? Fine with me.